Monday, August 8, 2011

Well, so there I was... oops... this is the title, not the paragraph land.

Well, so there I was, this time fo real. I was standing eye-to-eye with the giant sea serpent. But even then I was not afraid for I am the great Flavio! Er, uh... I meant justGeorge, but you get the picutre. Just picture me as an awesome guy and you'll be right.

I must say, today has been an interesting day. First I was almost kidnapped by some pirates. But thankfully if you use ivory soap or something, they can stand you. Plus if you throw some Jack Daniels overboard, the pirates will swim after it.

Well, after avoiding the plank, I was abducted by space aliens. This was mostly because I had lied to their two spies, telling them that I was ol' Kickbutt George back in the day. I told them I use hedgeclipers to shave and a lawnmower to cut my hair. They were almost convinced to abduct me, but then like the good ol' country boy that I am, I mooned them. That settled it.

They sucked me into their spaceship and was about to enact biological revenge (by snatching my body and a few cows' to take over the world) but I pulled out my trusty harmonica and played the blues. I don't know what caused me to do so, but that's unimportant. The point is, the aliens HATE the blues. They actually turned blue in the face after listening to a few verses and fainted dead away.

I ran out of their spaceship in a hurry. But then I was run over by an out of season reindeer. The worst part of it however, is that some country bumpkins kept calling me ol' grandma justGeorge. Being a city dweller, I didn't take that lying down. I gave them all a city version of a noogie, then a knuckle sandwich.

Speaking of sandwiches, you should go buy McDonalds right now. That way, you won't have to read the rest of this post. Why don't you go do that? I'll wait.

No, don't worry I'm still waiting. Go on.

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Ok, lets go.

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Uh... you going anytime soon?

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I don't have all day here.

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I'M SERIOUS!

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Alright, so anybody that was going to McDonalds anyway has gone. Now, all you semi-not-fat people out there, listen up.

I've got a new vocabulary word for you to memorize:


Supermarioandluigiareawesomeplumbersandwariostinksilikechickenespeciallyifitsfriedwritingsongsishardsoiuseapointypencilbeansandeggsagiantt-shirtisfuntowearespeciallyifitisredlookbothwaysbeforecrossingthestreetilovemakingupnewwordsjusttopassthetimetwinkletwinklelittlestarhowiwonderwhatorwhereorhowyouarealightbulbisshinyespeciallyifyoumicrowaveitbutitwillexplodeifyoudotheend

It's a type of eyeball cancer only found in Spain. It's mostly because the rain in spain stays mainly on the plains. Plus, all that spanishy stuff that they do must cause an increase of radiation in the area. Speaking of radiation and mutants and mutany, have I ever told you the story of when I was kidnapped by pirates...?

2 comments:

Kyle Muffin said...

too much to read..

justGeorge said...

This is what I mean by fatty McDonalds people.

jk! (justGeorge's Kung-Fu)

You're really a lazy fatty muffin.