Monday, January 4, 2010

Falcon Punch

I went to the library and saw a few children's stories. Read them and tell me what you think:


Once upon a time there was a story. This is it.

The End


Once upon a time there was another story. This isn't it.

The End


Once upon a time there was a castle. The castle has nothing to do with the story though.

The End


Yea, I think the publishers are pretty desperate. I could write better books than these. I think the quality has gone down severely after I was a kid. Most kids books today are all about brainwashing children with political messages. I remember a time where children's books were at least 700 pages long, no pictures. Now the only thing good about those books ARE the pictures. Man, what a let-down.

All complaining aside, my trip to the library was fascinating. I was able to kick some fat person with a flowing beard off "his" computer. "His" with a capital H that rhymes with... uh... something that stands for online gambling. He stinks at Poker by the way.

While the librarians and bearded person were arguing, I was able to research all about people who pick other people's noses for money. It actually pays quite well. The only problem is that they're really low in society. Somewhere between common thief and a laboratory mouse that wants to take over the world.

Speaking of bathrooms, I just went to one the other day.

That made me think of a good children's story I could write about going to the bathroom. Here it is:


Poop.

The End


I'm thinking of who the illustrator should be. The best situation would be someone with absolutely no sense of humor that draws the poop to scale with the toilet. I'm hoping for scientific labels and a little green texture.

So, comment about this book. I'm still thinking of a title.

10 comments:

justGeorge said...

What about "Plop and Ploppings"? This generally describes the entire book.

justGeorge said...

I was hoping for a little more flare to catch the kids' attentions.

justGeorge said...

What about "The Exciting Development of Sewage"?

justGeorge said...

No-one asked you. If I want your opinion, I'll tell you at the end of my rambling.

justGeorge said...

You told me to comment.

justGeorge said...

I didn't tell you to act stupid though. So shut up.

justGeorge said...

OK, I will if you're going to be nasty about it. I'll shut up.

justGeorge said...

Shut up, shutting up.

Mrs. C said...

LOL You're just so rude, but I like reading your blog anyway. :)

zakluv_145 said...

ya. it makes my brain develop faster :Dn