Apparently there's been a report that Yo Mama's Fat. Details are still sketchy, but reports say she's on a rampage, destroying local small towns. Our reporters of the justGeorge's Observant Department have been trying to track this glob for the past half hour. She seems impossible to track.
Local Yokel said, "It's hard to imagine such a disturbance in our fair town of Nowhere. I'm afraid of the earthquakes that are becoming more common. Ole' Betsy (my cow) has been tipped over so many times I'd think that some teenager was doing it."
Even our investigators have felt the tremors. This is due to Yo Mama rolling around, crushing buildings.
What could cause this catastrophe? Not many know. Yo Mama started her criminal career when she "got an offer she couldn't refuse" and that was this: steal some free gum. This started a downward spiral into theft to feed that ever-growing stomach of hers. She started shoplifting grocery stores for potato chips, and eventually worked her way to cannibalism.
Details of her history and appearance are not well known by many. Here is what we have so far:
Weight: Too Much
Ability: Thick Fat / Gluttony
Moves: Roll Out
Nickname: Jabba the Fatty Butt
No mugshot available.
For current photo, draw a circle in the dirt.